These past couple of weeks have been filled with days where I feel that I have finally reached a perfect rhythm with my students and we are plugging along to days when I feel like we are not even close to being there. My third grade colleague keeps reminding me that this is how we felt last year but it just seems so much tougher on some days.
There are certain students with whom I feel that it is taking more effort and time to connect. At times, these past couple of weeks it has seemed like the connection I thought was happening was just a false representation of what was really happening. Some days I notice that I am putting so much energy into these students and failing to see the rest of my students. This is a constant struggle I have because I want to make sure that I reach them all and make that meaningful connection that is going to benefit each one. I have to be very intentional in all of my actions and interactions with each child. I want them all to know that they matter and they are important. There were a few days when I went home feeling that I had not accomplished that.
As I went home feeling that way I was determined to figure out how to change it and not give up on my efforts. I knew that I must be making some sort of difference but not sure of what that was. As I reflected on it, I decided to resort to my daily practice of gratitude. To spend time honoring and being grateful for the small things. So throughout the week with my gratitude journal, I began to think of each student and address something about him/her that I could be grateful for. After doing this practice, I realized that there is so much about each student that I could write and that each one brings something wonderful and unique to my classroom. This helped me change my mindset during those difficult moments or times in the classroom.
I began to realize that although I may not be there yet with each student that there are things about each one that shows me I am making a difference and the connection is there.
The smile in the morning,
the secret handshake they have prepared for me,
the look they give me when I talk to them,
the “thank you” I receive,
the goodbyes at the end of the day.
Although days can be rough, I know that I am making a difference.
Each child holds characteristics that make him/her very special and unique. Through my gratitude practice, I have been able to discover that about each one and I love what I see.
In the smallest things I can find the wonder and beauty of each individual student. I will not give up doing that because every kid deserves it!